Blooming

 

As you all know,

I am striving to be a better, healthier, stress less (not free), and natural person. I am learning to love myself, take care of myself, lose weight, improve my mind, and understand how my body works. This was only suppose to be a "natural" hair blog, but it ended up turning into something more. Instead of  being just place to vent my feelings over my hair, this blog has become an agent of change for myself. It such a short time I have been motivated to do so many things.

Starting this natural hair journey has taught me many things about myself. It has taught me that I am beautiful, that I have the ability to become healthy and lose weight, that I can be my own person, to over come anxiety, and more. For so long I have tried to fit in a specified mold of what I was to look like, act like, and feel like that I became lost.

But now, I feel so at peace with myself. Since starting this journey, which took me 29 1/2 years to finally make, I have come to learn that people do not define me, my beauty, my personality, the feelings that I feel, and more......I define me. The pieces that make me into the person that I am are personal...both inside and out. It is not for others to determine or define. Being different makes me and everyone else who has the power to try..... beautiful.

 

I have made huge changes. I am sticking with one style, which was the purpose of this blog in the first place, and not changing my look chaotically like I was doing. This has taught me to be patient and control the need to fit a certain mold and other's expectations.


I am no longer beating myself up because I have tried to be natural before. Instead, I am praising myself for making the effort again and sticking to it.

I am speaking more in public again, being mindful of what I say by speaking slowly, and thinking about what I say before I say it. Since taking the time to work on this issue I have increased my participation in giving  in chapel services where I attend.  I also participated in karaoke, which is something I would not have ever thought of doing The anxiety that I once felt  that was so debilitating...I have learned to control and work through.

I took a vacation for myself. I didn't push it aside or make some excuse as to why I shouldn't go...I just went, on my own, treated myself, and had a good time. I knew that I needed it and deserved it. In this short time, I had made many awesome achievements and I needed a reward. And so, I took a trip, and loved every minute of it. I didn't have to go with a significant other or with family, I just went for myself.

My spiritual self has developed and grown. I am a religious person, but I needed to work on my spiritual side. I was so stressed out, tired, unhappy, overworked, and so on and so forth. That's what lead to the multiple hair styles, anxiety, and not letting the real me develop. Since beginning this journey, I have become more conscious about the vibes that I take in and put out. I have learned that it is my responsibility to keep myself in balance, and taking care of my soul and emotional well being is the key to maintaining a sound spiritual self.

 

So, in short I love being natural. Being natural has been a life altering experience. Even though it has been rough at times, it has taught me so much and given me the ability to see what I am capable of doing and achieving at  such a short time.

Whenever I think about this change that I am undertaking, I see myself ( and other naturals who have been through this), as a flower. In order for a flower to bloom, it has to be nurtured, taken care of, tended, water, loved, and more. Without such care, it will wither and die. When it is cared for, it will grow, bloom, and return better and better each year.

Blessings..The Lost Girl